"Lilo and Stitch"
Directed by Dean DeBlois and Chris Sanders.
Written by Dean DeBlois and Chris Sanders.
Starring the voices of Tia Carrere, Ving Rhames, Chris Sanders
and Daveigh Chase.
Release Year: 2002
Review Date: 6/27/02
Wrapping up my kid movie week (ok, not
really, but close), I hit the new Disney flick “Lilo & Stitch” this
week at the local multiplex.
As befitting a Disney film, there were
countless rugrats, tired-looking parents and two different instances
where babies were crying so loud that they had to be removed from
the theater. I have finally decided that I hate kids in movies more
than cell phones ringing; I have gotten so used to phones ringing
since I go to the theater three times a week now, it is pitiful.
But kids...man, like that old dog that you should have put out of
its misery four or five years ago, kids just wear on you physically
and emotionally, whinin’ for 30 or 40 minutes before they just force
your hand and make you wanna
HEY! REVIEW THE MOVIE!
My bad. “Lilo & Stitch” follows the story
of a four-armed alien that is referred to as Experiment 626 on his
home planet...where he is about to be exiled forever, since he was a
dangerous experiment that a mad scientist developed as a destructive
machine capable of obliterating anything in his path. Since he is
bulletproof, fireproof, and incapable of being run over by large
18-wheelers, Experiment 626’s alien government tries to run him out
of town, but he gets away in a space cruiser and accidentally hits
his hyperdrive button (it’s official: every single space vehicle in
the history of sci-fi movies has a hyperspace button), sending him
crashing to Earth. When he lands, is captured, and thrown into a
pet shop, he is discovered by a little Hawaiian girl named Lilo, who
buys him from the pet store and renames him Stitch. While it is
never made quite clear why Lilo decides upon Stitch as a name, Lilo
and Stitch form a bond that is supertight...until Stitch’s alien
handlers decide to come after him on Earth.
The best thing about “Lilo & Stitch” is how
simple it is; these days, it seems like kids’ movies really want to
go the route of the “Toy Story” films and make an incredibly
well-animated film while making sure to take care of both the adults
and the kids at the same time. Most movies don’t have a script good
enough to make that happen, anyway. “Lilo & Stitch” only has four
or five main characters for its entire 80 minutes, and one of them
can barely talk, so you really boil it down to the Lilo and Stitch
relationship and the sometimes-hilarious antics that Stitch gets
into while discovering things about his new planet. The other main
subplot deals with Lilo’s sister Nani (voiced by Tia Carrere) and
her attempts to keep a social service worker (voiced by Ving Rhames)
from taking Lilo into custody. The writers bring this situation
into our hands realistically enough to make it look fair, without
making the worker a bad guy.
Basically, this one just goes down real
easy. There are good laughs throughout and Lilo and Stitch make for
an entertaining pair. And, there are some of those feel-good
moments that remind me of that scene in “Airplane” where everyone
looks at the person next to them and gives them a little smile like
“Man, it’s great to be alive!” “Lilo & Stitch” has a few of those
and for the kids and adults alike, this one is worth the cash.
Rating: $9.00 Show
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Bellview Rating System:
"Opening Weekend": This is
the highest rating a movie can receive. Reserved for movies that
exhibit the highest level of acting, plot, character development,
setting...or Salma Hayek. Not necessarily in that order.
"$X.XX Show": This price
changes each year due to the inflation of movie prices; currently,
it is the $9.50 Show. While not technically perfect, this is a
movie that will still entertain you at a very high level.
"Undercover Brother" falls into this category; it's no "Casablanca",
but you'll have a great time watching. The $9.50 Show won't win any
Oscars, but you'll be quoting lines from the thing for ages (see
"Matinee": An average movie
that merits no more than a $6.50 viewing at your local theater.
Seeing it for less than $9.50 will make you feel a lot better about
yourself. A movie like "Blue Crush" fits this category; you leave
the theater saying "That wasn't too bad...man, did you see that
Lakers game last night?"
"Rental": This rating
indicates a movie that you see in the previews and say to your
friend, "I'll be sure to miss that one." Mostly forgettable, you
couldn't lose too much by going to Hollywood Video and paying $3 to
watch it with your sig other, but you would only do that if the
video store was out of copies of "Ronin." If you can, see this
movie for free. This is what your TV Guide would give "one and a
"Hard Vice": This rating is
the bottom of the barrel. A movie that only six other human beings
have witnessed, this is the worst movie I have ever seen. A Shannon
Tweed "thriller," it is so bad as to be funny during almost every
one of its 84 minutes, and includes the worst ending ever put into a
movie. Marginally worse than "Cabin Boy", "The Avengers" or
"Leonard, Part 6", this rating means that you should avoid this
movie at all costs, or no costs, EVEN IF YOU CAN SEE IT FOR FREE!
(Warning: strong profanity will be used in all reviews of "Hard