Directed by Gregory Hoblit.
Written by Toby Emmerich.
Starring Dennis Quaid and Jim Caviezel.
Release Year: 2000
Review Date: 5/13/00
I thought for this review, I would go back
to my time-honored Q&A format.
"FREQUENCY?" WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU GO AND
Well, you got me: this is not my normal
summer fare, but I am trying to expand my horizons a bit, to create
the "sensitive and sensual" image that passed me by during my sweat
pants period of years one and two of college. Anyway, the real
reason? I wanted to see
"Battlefield Earth", but Brian "Schmoove"
Prenoveau's response to my request was "there is no fucking way I am
going to see that movie." Mm-hmm! So, Christine "Cover Girl"
Kerner, a newbie to the Bellview list until this review, said ixnay
to her boyfriend and hello to an $8.50 showing at the Potomac Hoyts
Cinema in Alexandria.
OK, OK...SO, THE MOVIE.
Here's the thing about "Frequency": it is
that rare movie that tries ever so hard to be all things to all
people. In the hour and 45 minutes that I was in the theater, it
was a baseball movie, an action movie, a time-travel thriller, a
fantasy, a romance, and a bad episode of "NYPD Blue." Besides its
very interesting plot--a 1969 fireman (Dennis Quaid, worthless since
"The Big Easy" but pretty good in this film) makes contact with his
1999 grown-up cop son (Jim Caviezel, "The Thin Red Line") via a
short-wave radio that resides in both men's homes, since the son
lives in the same house as his father. For some reason,
surreally-intense sunspots make it possible for this kind of
communication to happen, so it gives the father a chance to
communicate with his grown-up son and find out what life is like in
the future. It also helps save the father's life early in the film
and enables the father-son combo to conduct an investigation on why
it seems that the father's wife/son's mother has been murdered.
Because the movie tried to do so much, it
didn't seem to do any one thing very well--despite the presence of
some really interesting performances by Quaid and Caviezel, as well
as "Homicide" vet Andre Braugher as a close family friend (or, as I
came to know him during the movie, the only black guy not playing
baseball for the Mets). By the time its closing minutes turn into a
mild shootout/chase sequence, I was wondering where the kind fantasy
movie had gone and the wannabe Stallone movie showed up. And, its
HEY, HAVE YOU EVER BROKEN UP WITH A GIRL
LIKE THEY DO IN THE MOVIES?
Actually, no. I have never walked into my
apartment, seen a girl packing up her things in a small
suitcase/carry-on item, and asked her, "So, that's it? After all
we've been through? You're just going to pack up and leave me?" I
assume that someone must have had this happen to them, because it
has become such a cliché in the movies that it doesn't ever register
as a dramatic scene to me. And, no, after the girl has left, I
don't pick up a bottle of whiskey/scotch/gin from my sparse liquor
cabinet and finish the whole bottle while walking the barely-lit
streets of my suburb wondering what it was that I have done wrong.
SO, TELL ME AGAIN: WHAT IS IT ABOUT MIAMI
THAT YOU LIKE SO MUCH?
Well, it's pretty simple: one, the
clubs--collectively and individually--are better than any club in
any city in America (and, believe me, I have been to some clubs).
Two, it isn't that there are "hot women on every corner", like
people in some other cities might say. It is that every person who
you walk past is at least marginally hot, if not an out-and-out
model. Three, topless beaches. Four, the best Latino food in this
country. And, five: the shopping is cool as shit.
FUNNIEST MOVIE YOU'VE EVER SEEN?
Hmm, that is tough...but, it has got to be
"I'm Gonna Git You Sucka", Keenan Ivory Wayans' crowning achievement
and the only film to feature the world famous speech "My Bitch Betta
Have My Money" during the Pimp of the Year sequence.
...AND, THE WORST MOVIE YOU'VE EVER SEEN?
Well, many of you know that "Hard Vice" is
the worst, but a close second is clearly "Leonard, Part 6", the
disastrous action movie starring Bill Cosby and a bunch of fucking
farm animals. You need to treat yourself to a viewing of this film;
I was convinced about halfway through that this was the worst movie
I had seen (until, of course, Shannon Tweed jiggled her way to fame
in "Hard Vice"), and it delivers the shitty goods in its final,
awful half hour. And, no: “Leonard, Parts 1-5” were never made.
WHAT'S UP WITH "GRATUITOUS 2"?
Well, now that Dave Bell--starring as Tyrone
Thomas, DC's finest black private dick--is back from college,
production must go into overdrive. Although we were originally
shooting for a July 4th release, it looks now like it will be
Christmas time, since I just won't have the coin to have it edited
before then. If you haven't seen "Gratuitous"--The New York Times
described it as "'The Blair Witch Project', with about one-fourth of
the budget"--you need to contact Bellview to get yourself a copy.
CAN YOU THINK OF A COOLER BELLVIEW MEMBER
THAN STEFAN PRELOG?
Man, not really; the guy is just flat-out
cool. After running the gamut of talk shows in New York City, this
literary badass has started writing advice columns and pick-up
reviews of local holes in the city for the getting
sexually-challenged folks around the globe. You can check Stefan
out at http://www.clubplanet.com under G-spots, or in the latest issue of
Stuff Magazine, in the article titled, Tell What She's Like in Bed
Just by Looking at Her on page 78. (Shameless promotion is one of
my best skills.)
IS THIS A MOVIE REVIEW, OR JUST AN
OPPORTUNITY FOR YOU TO TALK ABOUT A WHOLE LOT OF RANDOM SHIT?
Well, a man has got to keep things
interesting, and sometimes, the best way to do it is to not talk
about what the reader had in mind. And besides, I'm creatively
tapped today, and I wanted to at least make this fun!
Comments? Drop me a line at
Bellview Rating System:
"Opening Weekend": This is
the highest rating a movie can receive. Reserved for movies that
exhibit the highest level of acting, plot, character development,
setting...or Salma Hayek. Not necessarily in that order.
"$X.XX Show": This price
changes each year due to the inflation of movie prices; currently,
it is the $9.50 Show. While not technically perfect, this is a
movie that will still entertain you at a very high level.
"Undercover Brother" falls into this category; it's no "Casablanca",
but you'll have a great time watching. The $9.50 Show won't win any
Oscars, but you'll be quoting lines from the thing for ages (see
"Matinee": An average movie
that merits no more than a $6.50 viewing at your local theater.
Seeing it for less than $9.50 will make you feel a lot better about
yourself. A movie like "Blue Crush" fits this category; you leave
the theater saying "That wasn't too bad...man, did you see that
Lakers game last night?"
"Rental": This rating
indicates a movie that you see in the previews and say to your
friend, "I'll be sure to miss that one." Mostly forgettable, you
couldn't lose too much by going to Hollywood Video and paying $3 to
watch it with your sig other, but you would only do that if the
video store was out of copies of "Ronin." If you can, see this
movie for free. This is what your TV Guide would give "one and a
"Hard Vice": This rating is
the bottom of the barrel. A movie that only six other human beings
have witnessed, this is the worst movie I have ever seen. A Shannon
Tweed "thriller," it is so bad as to be funny during almost every
one of its 84 minutes, and includes the worst ending ever put into a
movie. Marginally worse than "Cabin Boy", "The Avengers" or
"Leonard, Part 6", this rating means that you should avoid this
movie at all costs, or no costs, EVEN IF YOU CAN SEE IT FOR FREE!
(Warning: strong profanity will be used in all reviews of "Hard