Directed by Jesse Dylan.
Written by Adam Herz.
Starring Jason Biggs, Seann William Scott and Eugene Levy.
Release Year: 2003
Review Date: 8/8/03
After my friend “Melissa” Kern and I walked
out of the theater following our viewing of the third “American Pie”
film, “American Wedding”, I was obsessing over all of the trilogies
I have seen to date. Why? I was trying to think of another film
series that relied so heavily on a single character to provide its
entertainment like this series has...because, just like the blah
“American Pie 2”, “American Wedding” is only watchable because of
one actor: Seann William Scott.
His Stifler is one of the great comedic
characters maybe ever; his lines are sometimes quite funny, but
Scott’s physical performance is the absolute singular reason to see
“American Wedding.” Really, he has put these three films on his
back in a way not seen since Jordan was leading the Bulls to all of
those titles; I wondered if the cast and crew of “American Wedding”
thought during production
“Man, without this Stifler character, we
don’t have shit here.”
because it’s true!! “American Wedding”
features an initial 15 minutes where I thought I might have to get
up and leave. I mean, it is THAT boring. Then, Stifler shows up at
a reception for newly-engaged partners Jim (Jason Biggs) and
Michelle (Alyson Hannigan) and starts to give the film a little
life, even if his first few laughs are courtesy of the film’s
trailer. But, by the time the guys have to travel to Chicago to a
gay club, oh, are we in for some good action. Stifler has a
dance-off with a large gay man by the name of Bear...and there was
constant laughter for the next two minutes as Stifler and Bear go
toe-to-toe trying to outdance one another. Stifler makes moves on
Michelle’s hot sister Cadence (January Jones)...laughter. Stifler
orders strippers...laughter. Stifler teaches Jim how to
dance...laughter. Stifler reaction shots...laughter. Stifler eats
a “truffle”...uhh, nasty, but I was still laughing my ass off.
And, when Stifler is not around, the movie
goes right to shit. The character of Michelle was a one-trick pony
in the FIRST film; how has Hannigan hung around this long? The
relationship that Michelle and Jim have makes no sense to me, and it
is very poorly conceived in this film; it doesn’t help that Michelle
is essentially reduced to a horny 22-year-old for her only real
comedy in the film. Jim’s friends Kevin (Thomas Ian Nicholas) and
Finch (Eddie Kaye Thomas) don’t have much going on here, either;
they were pawns in the first two films, but at least Kevin had
something to do; here, he is totally wasted. Finch’s jokes come
mostly at the expense of Stifler, so I don’t know if I was laughing
at Finch’s jokes or Stifler’s reaction shots, but if I had to
guess...it was Stifler! Even the normally-hilarious Fred Willard
(as Michelle’s dad) is forced to read bad line after bad line while
waiting for another Stifler scene to bail him out.
The melodrama in “American Wedding” is so
bad at times that I had to look away and hide my unborn children’s
eyes. The script is just weak and the direction is loose and
carefree...not so good when you only have one performer that seems
capable of really improvising his own humor. Then I waited for the
credits and had to look up the director online; the same man that
brought us “How High” with Redman and Method Man got this gig,
giving me the feeling that the producers felt just about ANYBODY
could have directed this and it would have made money.
Unfortunately, no one was too concerned about a quality product,
For the fourth film--rumored in the works
and nearly a certainty given the third film’s opening box office
totals--I am hopeful that they call it “American Pie 4: Absolutely
Stifler” and stop messing around with this shit. Stifler is genius;
the rest of this is crap. The potential cult status of the first
“American Pie” film is completely erased from my memory because
these rat fuckers sold out and tried to make three films.
Comments? Drop me a line at
Bellview Rating System:
"Opening Weekend": This is
the highest rating a movie can receive. Reserved for movies that
exhibit the highest level of acting, plot, character development,
setting...or Salma Hayek. Not necessarily in that order.
"$X.XX Show": This price
changes each year due to the inflation of movie prices; currently,
it is the $9.50 Show. While not technically perfect, this is a
movie that will still entertain you at a very high level.
"Undercover Brother" falls into this category; it's no "Casablanca",
but you'll have a great time watching. The $9.50 Show won't win any
Oscars, but you'll be quoting lines from the thing for ages (see
"Matinee": An average movie
that merits no more than a $6.50 viewing at your local theater.
Seeing it for less than $9.50 will make you feel a lot better about
yourself. A movie like "Blue Crush" fits this category; you leave
the theater saying "That wasn't too bad...man, did you see that
Lakers game last night?"
"Rental": This rating
indicates a movie that you see in the previews and say to your
friend, "I'll be sure to miss that one." Mostly forgettable, you
couldn't lose too much by going to Hollywood Video and paying $3 to
watch it with your sig other, but you would only do that if the
video store was out of copies of "Ronin." If you can, see this
movie for free. This is what your TV Guide would give "one and a
"Hard Vice": This rating is
the bottom of the barrel. A movie that only six other human beings
have witnessed, this is the worst movie I have ever seen. A Shannon
Tweed "thriller," it is so bad as to be funny during almost every
one of its 84 minutes, and includes the worst ending ever put into a
movie. Marginally worse than "Cabin Boy", "The Avengers" or
"Leonard, Part 6", this rating means that you should avoid this
movie at all costs, or no costs, EVEN IF YOU CAN SEE IT FOR FREE!
(Warning: strong profanity will be used in all reviews of "Hard